For a couple of days, I was just…ummm, ishy…yup, sure was, in many ways I guess I was having a pity party, a woe is me kind of thing…yes, the deep one has a couple of those a year…but yesterday was the worse…I ended up in a vehicle with several of my co-workers and they yattered and yattered…annoyed the heck out of me, normally I would be able to ignore, or write stories in my head, but yesterday it annoyed…got back to the office and head was hammering…
When I got home it was a couple of hours before church, so I went to my office and started blasting, I mean blasting Shirley Murdock’s gospel album…I rocked and rolled…then I got on the internet and started opining…felt good, needed to get some stuff off my chest…
Then my man came home and three words in, I could see that he knew exactly where I was…we got in the car, I said something, he said something I didn’t like it…woo hoo…he simply smiled at me…smirking back I said to him, “ I really hope Pastor C, kicks my butt tonight, I need a rhema word, I need him to bring it…’ well honey, I got what I asked for…
He did the parable on the Pharisee and the tax collector and oh my God, I saw myself in all my ugly…and I loved every single moment of it, even when I was going ‘OW, OW, OW’…I could feel myself calming down, recognizing my own ‘holier than thou’ attitude I had been assuming all day and I took my beating, because I had it coming…that is what being saved is about…not perfect, but willing to see your own mess and recognize that you are just as jacked up and sin filled as everyone else, but also to know that God sends you messages and that what you really have to do is listen, believe, accept and ask God to forgive you for your mess, over and over and over again, and do your best, to do better, knowing that you will once again fall short, but you are covered by a loving, forgiving God who knows your heart and will heal your ugly…
BE THE PEACE YOU SEEK~
angelia
www.angeliavmenchan.com
